For most kids, childhood is a wonderful thing. You’re loved, cared for, played with. Not much is expected of you; life is safe and predictable. So, what’s the deal with big girl this, big boy that? Some children respond positively to this push forward while others, perhaps wisely, resist- some with a vengeance.

Anxiety can cloud rational, confident thinking. Stressed kids become paralyzed about decision making, even when it comes to trivial things like choosing breakfast cereal, a bedtime book, or what shirt to wear. Parental emotions may fan the flame.

Self-control begins very early in development. Before a baby is born, she perceives her mother’s routines for rest and activity. In the post-natal world, newborns continue to respond to patterns. Look at the development of self-control as a triangle. Self-regulation—a baby’s ability to be soothed and comforted—is the first element of the triad. Babies also have a basic ability to self-soothe. They use sensory-motor actions, including staring at a ceiling fan and sucking on their thumb to accomplish this.

A baby’s sense of himself and others starts right from birth and the most important teachers are a child’s parents. Raising a boy who respects girls and women should begin with expectations about how a little boy treats his mother (and other important females in his life). Therefore it is important for caregivers to set firm limits about behavior, including personal boundaries, egalitarian beliefs and respect.

Appropriate parental attentiveness promotes a secure parent-child relationship in the early years.  So, fretting has its roots in love and care.  Ideally, as the child grows in resilience and independence, parents become less anxious and vigilant; but this doesn’t always happen. Worry can become a fixed pattern, even as the baby gradually transforms into a more independent being.

Our days are made up of transitions from one activity to the next. Most children and adults ride the daily waves of shifts, adjustments, and changes smoothly. But for some kids, moving from “now to next” can be jarring and stressful, especially for children with anxiety, ADHD, or autism (or all of these).

Problems most commonly arise when a child is coerced or pressured before he or she is ready. Parents may feel pressure to speed up toilet training due to pre-school demands or a new baby's birth. When rushed, your child may comply for a while and then decide months later that he prefers the pull-up to the toilet. What worked before to get Junior to poop in the toilet will be a no-go once he understands that he controls his own body functions.

While on first blush, “kids first” may seem like a great advantage for today’s children, I would disagree. It is daunting to “be in charge” at any age. It’s even more anxiety-provoking when you are a kid in charge of the grown-ups (who are supposed to be smarter and stronger than you). Most kids want to be second banana—even if they act like they want to be boss.

Thankfully this monster of a year is finally in the rearview mirror. Disruption came in various forms including a global pandemic, epic political conflict, human rights demonstrations, and natural disasters. While these crises are far from sorted, a fresh start feels hopeful.  As we continue to stay close to home, there is space to reflect on the challenges, losses, and triumphs of 2020.

Parents of children with autism often struggle with why, when, and how to share the diagnosis with the child. The “why” part of this issue is clear: children deserve to know about themselves are and why they may struggle. Part of the process of defining our identity is self awareness. For this reason telling

Holidays are special for many reasons like good food, time off from school and work, and family gatherings. While they are not always ideal due to inherent stress and drama, family get-togethers can be very important to the development of children’s emotional health and happiness.

Party pooper, stick in the mud, Debbie downer are all terms for negative thinkers. Negative or pessimistic people can be a drag and are often avoided. This is not only true of adults it’s the same for negative thinking kids. While this may be a chicken or egg situation, pessimists start to feel rejected and this leads to more negative thinking about others, themselves, and the world in general. When negativity becomes entrenched in one’s way of thinking, it can lead to learned helplessness.

Many families seek professional advice before, during, and after a divorce. This is a difficult time no matter how it is addressed. However, there are standard guidelines that are important for parents to follow. For instance, children need to be provided with the reassurance of their safety, their parents’ wellbeing, and how their lives will change in the wake of the divorce.

Some people are natural risk-takers who are nimble and can pivot when encountering the unexpected. None of them are reading this article. For the rest of us, learning to cope with risk and uncertainty takes effort and practice. Since these two irritants will be around for a while, we should learn to adjust- if not for ourselves than for our children who are watching and learning.

Women are drinking more now than at any point in history due to social trends, marketing, and stress.

Since autism is on the rise, parents and professionals have become more aware of the early symptoms of autism and more children are being identified at younger ages. (While most children are identified after age 4 years, autism can be diagnosed at younger ages.) This is good news because early treatment can significantly improve the outcome

Allow your child to question, explore, ponder and try new things. Encourage unstructured time for your child to just be (limit screen time). Provide a secure base that the child can return to. Listen and do not judge, guide but do not lead.

Most of us cruise through our days on autopilot with little regard for the important things. Then an event happens that shakes us back into consciousness like a serious illness, hurricane, or the recent pandemic.

Parents and children have made it through many challenging months of quarantine. Now the thought on most parents’ minds is the decision about school enrollment in the fall.

  Behold the bungling father.  Ever noticed how dads have been portrayed in the media? They tend to be cast in the role of loveable goofball, an inept stand-in for Mother.